21/12/2012

Funny Games - Psycho Santa - Classic Commodore Amiga Game

Psycho Santa Amiga
As we approach the festive season it's time to take a look at a funny game that was created in the true spirit of Christmas.

Psycho Santa is a classic game that was put together by the excellent Bullfrog software and released as a magazine cover-disk. In the true spirit of giving the game was licensed as shareware.

The magazine was 'The One'. The year was 1993. The machine was the Commodore Amiga. The game itself was a real humorous treat to get you in the mood for Chrimbo...

A funny loading screen to set the Christmas scene...
I don't know how to describe this game. It's part horizontal scrolling shoot em up, part vertical bounce and collect.

What I can say is that there are plenty of laughs to be had. The graphics reek of shareware (as you would expect) and the sound effects follow suit.

But the sound effects consist of real low grade humour (which I like), and this is just the type of game to raise a few belly laughs.

In fact, I'm pretty sure that Billy Bob Thornton took inspiration from this game ;-)

Where's the rest of me reindeer?

Have a couple of mince pies, a few well deserved Christmas drinks and stick this on. Then only one question remains; will you fart more times than your Amiga?

Ho, Ho and indeed, HO!

Merry Christmas everyone.

That psycho takes to the skies... Classic Arcade Action:


Classic Games, Arcade Games and Funny Games

24/09/2012

Funny Games - Brutal Sports Football - Classic Commodore Amiga Game

Brutal Sports Football Amiga
This classic game was a hybrid of sports sim / beat em up game for the Commodore Amiga.

It was released back in 1993 by Millennium and was developed by Teque Software.

If you liked American Football and / or the Speedball games from the legendary Bitmap Brothers then this game would be one for you.

It managed to combine over the top violence with sporting action to create a game that was rewarding and fun to play. As far as Brutal Sports go, then this one was right up there with the best of em...

Let's get Brutal

The aim of the game was (as you may have guessed) to win the match by any means necessary.

Now in the Speedball series of games you could injure an opposition player to earn points for your team, here it was an actual necessity!

As far as classic arcade games go this one is not quite up there with the likes of Speedball II (not many games are), but as it stands it's a pretty good blast from start to finish.

Hack, Punch, Stomp...
Winning was achieved by scoring goals, but the most points (and fun) was to had by hacking, stomping, punching and kicking the opposition players. Classic arcade action all the way.

Gamers will no doubt remember decapitating an opposition team member then kicking the head for a field goal. Which was always worth a laugh.

In fact, the playing field would end up littered with corpses and body parts as the game went on, with huge holes left in the ground as the grass was churned up by the violence. Nice touch actually.

The game-play was a little limited but there were upgrades to collect such as fast feet, broadswords and bombs to keep things interesting.

All in all this was a decent effort at something a little different. Two player mode was always a hoot as you doled out a good kicking to your best mate.

All in all as far as funny games go, this is a decent effort from the halcyon days of the Amiga...

Brutal Sports Football - classic gaming
Classic Games, Arcade Games and Funny Games

20/04/2012

Funny Games - Adventures Of St Bernard - Classic ZX Spectrum Game

The Adventures Of St Bernard
Hey folks! This 'classic game' (ahem) has already appeared in the 'crap games' section of my ZX Spectrum Games blog - but it is such a bad game it makes it funny!

Would you believe that Carnell actually had the audacity to charge £5.95 for this slice of 'arcade action' originally?

It wasn't even worth the £1.99 that Mastertronic were asking for a year later (that I shelled out) on re-release. Still, you've got to look back and laugh eh?

Mind you, the loading screen was okay at the time...

I need a barrel of brandy to get over this game

The whole point to the game was to rescue the usual damsel in distress from the clutches of the abominable snowman.

Gamers are the ones that need to be rescued from this abominable computer game. The inlay instructions actually used words like 'intrepid' and 'icy wastelands' to convey the terror and action of the situation. Unfortunately it doesn't work quite like that...

The game is a horizontally scrolling affair (supposed arcade action), and you control the hero who must fend off attacks from wolves and jump over broken ice. Attacks always occur from your rear, so you can scare them away by turning to face them or if you time it right, bite them (use your imagination please) to kill them outright.

After you have got far enough (the background scrolls painfully slowly) you will reach stage two!

Now you have to jump over water patches and avoid the walrusses that poke their heads up through the ice-holes.

Turn You Unresponsive Bastard!
If you have the luck or patience you'll reach stage three where you have to climb a hill and avoid the rolling snowballs. A bit like a really crappy Donkey Kong on ice with virtually no chance of the player winning.

If you make it past this it'll be more by luck than judgement - I never ever did, and never ever will.

The controls are sluggish, the graphics laughable, the sound pretty much non-existent and the gameplay.... well there is no gameplay. You will laugh as you press the jump key and wait for an hour for your character to respond.

You will laugh as you somehow manage to fend off the attackers without really knowing how you did it. This game really is so bad, it somehow becomes good.

Check out my valiant attempts in the video below:

Arcade Games, Classic Games and Funny Games